But as we get older, we may find we are lonely even without the pandemic restrictions, especially if we are housebound or living alone for the first time in years. So, as we face loneliness, what does God say about the situation? How can His truth help us?

While we may not agree that loneliness is the ‘scariest’ thing we face, God is clear that it is not a good thing. Remember the creation story when God said everything was good? There was one thing He didn’t think was good, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’ (Genesis 2:18), and so Eve was made as a perfect companion.

The theme of community runs through the Bible. For example, in the Old Testament God calls the nation of Israel to be His people and the Psalmist states that God ‘sets the lonely in families…’ (Psalm 68:6). In the New Testament the church is described as a ‘body’, a ‘family’, a ‘household’ (1 Timothy 3) showing that as Christians we are all automatically part of a family even if we have no blood relatives.

But despite these things, being true we may still feel lonely, so what steps can we take in that situation? There has been lots of information produced to seek to combat loneliness which is easily accessible, but I just want to start by mentioning a couple of practical suggestions that may be helpful.

One idea is that maybe we can reach out to other lonely people which not only helps us but helps others too. For example, my mother lives in a small village where someone started a ‘Singles Group’ for those who are on their own. They meet in each other’s homes for tea and a chat on Sunday afternoons, a time which can be particularly difficult for those who live their own. Maybe you could start a similar group in your area?

Another practical step is to think of ways to help others. We may be limited by our circumstances or health but there are things we could all do if we put our minds to it. Why not send someone an encouraging message in a card or a text, or leave a bunch of flowers outside someone’s door, or make a cake for people who have moved in near you. Be inventive- there are so many ways we can bless people and by reaching out to others, we are also helping ourselves by not focusing on our loneliness.

But how can our status as children of God help us when we feel lonely? One thing we can do is to spend time praying, literally being with God who is described as, ‘A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows.’ (Psalm 68:5) Maybe God can use our loneliness to bring us closer to Him?

Not only can we help ourselves not to be lonely by spending time with God, but we can also tell Him how lonely we feel. After all, He is our loving heavenly Father and Jesus said, ‘Your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.’ (Matthew 6:8). We can ask him to help us to cope with our feelings of loneliness knowing that He holds us in His hands and He will bless us, whether that means sending someone round or giving us His comfort and peace.

We can also focus on the fact that as Christians, although we may struggle with feelings of loneliness, we are never alone. You may remember the song which includes the words, ‘Now I am your child, I am a member of your family and I can never be alone ‘cos Father God you’re there beside me…’. I always liked the song, but the challenge is do we actually believe the truth of it? Do we realise that these are not just nice words for children but they are amazing truths for all Christians? And can we let it help us in our feelings of loneliness?

We can seek to impress the truth of these words on our hearts in practical ways. For example, mealtimes can feel quite lonely. However, some people find that setting two places or putting a spare mug across the table helps them to feel that Jesus is present with them in the same way as a physical friend. This visual aid can be a helpful reminder of His presence and of His promise, ‘If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me’. I know this is not human contact, but it can really help illustrate that we are not alone.

I’m not trying to make it all sound easy, as it clearly isn’t, but let’s remind ourselves that even if loneliness is ‘the scariest thing out there’ it is covered by Paul’s words, ‘I am convinced that [nothing] will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord’. (Romans 8:38,39). We can rely on the love God has for us at all times in all the situations we face, even loneliness.

Questions to think about:

• How much is loneliness a problem in your life at the moment?
• What practical steps can we take to avoid loneliness?
• Are there any ways we can help others who may be lonely- and in so doing, maybe help ourselves?
• How much do you believe that loneliness can be helped by the fact God is with us? How much do you experience that truth? Are there any practical ways we can be more aware of that truth?
• Try using the words of Psalm 27:4 as a prayer each day for a week to encourage you that you can dwell with God.

As Christians we can choose to spend not just one day, but every day with the almighty God! This is not just an interesting idea to discuss, it is a reality that is available to us.

I love the idea that every day is new and the potential that each day holds.  I am excited by the idea that no day is unnoticed or pointless in God’s plan. I rejoice in the fact that God’s compassion is ‘new every morning.’ (Lamentations 3:22-23) and I love hearing the words of the Psalmist, ‘I will exalt you, my God the King… Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. (Psalm 145: 1-2)

Each day and each moment is precious wherever we are and whatever we are doing. As we get older,  we have less days left on earth, but maybe this can lead to us valuing each one more. We may be increasingly frail or housebound or finding life more and more difficult but we can all seek to consciously live in God’s presence each day and to recognise what he is doing in our lives.

Firstly, how can we ensure we remember God each moment of the day? One way we can do this is by having physical things that we can see, or actions we can do that remind us of God. This is not a new idea, it was given by God as instructions to his people in the Old Testament, ‘These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door-frames of your houses and on your gates.’ (Deuteronomy 6:6) Basically the Israelites were instructed to talk about God’s commands and to take steps to ensure they were constantly reminded of God. We too need to apply that idea to our own lives. When our daughter lived at home, she put a note on the front door so the last thing we saw as we went out was ‘Stop! Think! How am I going to glorify God today?’ It was a surprisingly effective reminder.

Or, there may be certain actions that you do that can serve to remind you of God’s love and care. For example, I have started seeing the act of opening the curtains in the morning as a blessing to me. As I look out on the new day, I am aware that the sun has risen once again showing that God is still sustaining the world. I have to confess that this is not my own idea. Tim Chester expresses it much better than I can in his book ‘Enjoying God’; ‘I may wake up tomorrow morning feeling spiritually dry. I may feel crushed by my guilt or weighed down by my responsibilities. I may feel I lack God’s immediate support. But I open my curtains and see that the sun has risen. I recognise by faith that this is God’s world. He continues to care for his creation and he continues to care for me. He’s fathering me even if today I feel spiritually dry. I’m experiencing his love even though I don’t have any warm sensations inside…’ 1

Maybe we can all begin to notice things in our lives that point us to God?

Secondly, how can we learn to see the events of our lives each day as a visual aid through which God can teach us?

We can all get into the habit of looking back on the events of each day and seeing the evidence of God acting in our lives. At the moment, we have our daughter and son-in-law and granddaughter (aged 3) living with us. Sometimes when I get home from work as soon as I open the door, I know that my granddaughter is back from nursery. The evidence is unmistakable. Her coat is on the floor, her school bag is on the bench and there is a line of biscuit crumbs between the kitchen and the lounge. On the other hand, there are other days when I am busy or distracted and I come in without noticing the signs all around me that tell me she is there. I think it is similar regarding the evidence for God’s work in our lives. Some days, I see evidence of God all around, but other days I just don’t notice.

Let us make sure we have our eyes open to see the evidence of God in our lives.

Questions for reflection:

How can we remember the presence of God each day?

What physical things or what actions could remind you of God’s presence?

How do you think trying to look at each day from God’s perspective would help you in your situation?

How much would it help to write down things that have reminded you of God’s presence with you today?

References

Tim Chester, Enjoying God (The Good Book Company, 2018), p. 175

During the first lockdown of Covid-19 last year, I wasn’t able to visit my Dad in his care home Leonora Home, run by Pilgrims’ Friend Society. I wanted to find a way to help him in his walk with God, knowing that the usual interactions and support that he would have might be halted for a while.

I began putting together a photo-book of all kinds of images from nature combined with brief Bible texts, as his Alzheimer’s disease had advanced to a stage where he was struggling to read his Bible alone after a lifelong routine of daily Bible reading. Dad enjoyed the book, the home’s staff were complimentary, and other residents also used it, so Pilgrims’ Friend Society decided to publish their own version to make it available as a low-key devotional tool.

Called ‘God’s Word in God’s World’, it is a glossy hardback book of colourful photos with short Bible passages mixed in, rather than separated on a different page where they could be missed. The words are in giant print to make them easier to read and the pages are of thicker paper to make them easier to turn. It’s also A5 landscape to make it easier to hold. At £8.99 it makes a lovely gift.

The particular photos and Bible verses have been selected to prompt memories as well as to be eye-catching, which makes the book useful for starting conversations and for reminiscing. For example, the peacock on the front cover was chosen not just for its beautiful, vibrant colours but also because it is linked to a family anecdote for my Dad, which is explained in the book’s foreword.

The mixture of images of all types of creation means that the reader will find something to which they are particularly drawn, and a variety of carefully selected Bible translations will help to ease understanding.  The book can be used alone, or with others of all ages. The bright colours and easy-to-read text makes it a wonderful opportunity for children and older people to enjoy God’s word together. It can be used by churches to support their community members, as a gift for those moving away or into a care home, or just as an opportunity to bless others. It can also be used for reaching those who don’t yet know the Lord.

I really hope that this book will be a lovely treat for anyone at whatever stage of life and spiritual growth, maybe to help people to find a new way to receive from God.

 You can purchase a copy of ‘God’s Word in God’s world’ here.

Ruth Ranger, Community Engagement Officer at Pilgrims’ Friend Society. Ruth is also a Faith in Later Life Church Champion. For more information about our free Church Champion community click here. 

11 churches across our area (Frinton-on-Sea, Kirby-le-Soken and Walton on the Naze) came together this Easter to bless our 21 local care homes and sheltered housing units, with their 550 residents and 450 staff.

Each resident received an Easter card with a hand-written message of hope and a chocolate heart.  Cards were circulated among the churches and individually written by members of the different congregations.

Each manager was given a resource pack to support them with providing spiritual care for their residents, including some laminated prayers, some quiz booklets, a perpetual calendar with a Bible verse for each day, DVDs of Easter hymns and exercises to do at home, a booklet for carers called ‘How to take care of yourself in stressful times’ from the Bible Reading Fellowship, a booklet explaining the Easter message, and contact details for all the churches.  The contents of these packs were contributed by the different churches.

Each staffroom received a luxury hamper with chocolates, biscuits, tea, coffee and toiletries to show our appreciation of all they have done – and are doing – during such challenging times.  Members of churches across the area donated items and gifts to help make up the hampers.

We hope and pray that by visiting each home during Holy Week to deliver these goodies, staff and residents will know they are loved and appreciated and that this may lead to future opportunities for churches to befriend and support our local care homes.

Sally Bates, Associate Pastor, Frinton Free Church and member of Anna Chaplaincy network. Sally is also a Faith in Later Life Church Champion. For more information about our free Church Champion community click here. 

The concept of Dementia-friendly communities was introduced in 2012, which aimed to increase awareness of the needs of people living with Dementia across sectors, organisations, and the public; to build a better understanding of how to support people and their families. Christian faith organisations play an important part in the development and success of Dementia-friendly communities. Churches often have premises and sites which can serve the community, human resources that can support services and provide support to people in the community, and leadership and network opportunities to develop local improvements across communities. 

Dementia-friendly communities need Christian faith organisations to encourage and uphold positive regard and value of people with Dementia, through raised awareness, better understanding, challenging negative attitudes, and improving the use of language. Churches can create inclusive and welcoming spaces to enable intergenerational, cross-community working and interactions; to encourage people with dementia to stay active, involved, and participate in groups and events. Church services can be planned to meet the needs of people with Dementia through the use of familiar songs, prayers, and liturgy; with shorter talks and a more formal style of worship. 

Developing Dementia-friendly communities is not about having separate facilities or services for people living with Dementia – it is about a community willing to adapt itself to better meet the needs of people living with Dementia; to stay active, involved, and included in their community. Services such as transport, retail, banking, utilities, and health services are all trying to make themselves accessible, approachable, and helpful towards those with Dementia. There is a move away from community groups and services specifically for people with Dementia – rather a move towards all community groups and services being accessible and inclusive for people living with Dementia. 

Dementia-friendly churches should be part of Dementia-friendly communities. This is more than simply holding a Dementia service, it requires a commitment at all levels of the church to consider the needs of people living with Dementia; a willingness to change. It requires a vision from the leadership and commitment from all members to change how the church manages its buildings, grounds, worship, pastoral care, ministry, and mission.

In recent years, more churches have begun to work towards becoming Dementia-friendly and being more inclusive of people living with Dementia and their families. However, even with the right environment and buildings, people with Dementia may go unnoticed, excluded, or forgotten if there is a lack of awareness and understanding of the condition. 

Reflection 

• How many people with Dementia use our church services, buildings, outreach activities? 
• In what ways do we currently support people living with Dementia and their families? 
• How approachable, accessible and inclusive is our church fellowship to people living with dementia?

There is a range of advice and guidance from different Christian organisations regarding developing a Dementia-Friendly church: 

Livability has published a practical guide “Developing a Dementia-friendly church”. This provides information about Dementia, and practical guidance on the attitude, relationships, styles of worship, and church environment to positively support people with Dementia. It stresses the need to engage with people with Dementia and their carers and encourages partnership and networking with others in the community. 

The Church of England has developed a church self-review toolkit, ”Becoming a Dementia-friendly church”, for churches to assess and plan how to make their church services, pastoral support, buildings, and community networks more Dementia-friendly.

Pilgrims’ Friend Society have published downloadable booklets and information packs on supporting the pastoral needs of people with Dementia. They also provide training for church groups on spiritual support, as well as practical tips for people with Dementia and their families. 

The Prama Foundation have developed a church resource pack to help churches and church leaders to understand what dementia is and how to effectively minister to those who are living with Dementia and those who look after them, ensuring that groups and services are accessible to those living with Dementia and that church buildings are accessible. 

Professor Keith Brown from ‘Guidance for Christian Faith Organisations in the Support and Value of Older People’ – become a church champion to receive a free hard copy of the full guidance booklet.

As a 22-year-old student, I found myself sitting across the table from a man in a pub in Cardiff as he recounted his experience of caring for his mother. She was 85 and living with Alzheimer’s Disease.

It was one of the first assignments on my journalism course, one of my first experiences of interviewing anyone, and one of my first encounters with someone facing the issue of dementia.

For my interviewee, let’s call him Robert, it was like the floodgates opened. Over the course of the evening, barely pausing to sip his pint, he told me what life had been like in the eight years since his mother’s diagnosis.

At the start, he’d struggled to get support from social services. “It’s like a secret garden and you’ve got to get access,” he reflected, “I just feel that if I wasn’t pushy in a nice, diplomatic, political way then you could be left floundering.”

While Robert struggled to navigate the social care system – everything took what seemed like an inordinately long time – his mother’s illness progressed. He told of how she’d call him up nine times an evening to say the same thing. How at mealtimes she always ate voraciously because she couldn’t remember if she had already eaten that day. How he felt he couldn’t relax when out with friends because he was always watching the clock.

Two years before, he’d given up his job as a lecturer to take care of her full-time. Although he didn’t live with his mother, caring for her amounted to over 60 hours a week.

While Robert was clearly devoted to his mother, the stresses and strains were showing.

At Pilgrims’ Friend Society, part of our mission is to equip the church with the resources it needs to care for older people, as well as caring for those living with dementia in our care homes. According to the Alzheimer’s Research UK, there are currently 850,000 in the UK living with dementia, with 700,000 friends and family caring for them. To help the many who find themselves in situations like Robert’s, and the churches they are part of, we’ve recently updated our dementia information pack.

Entitled ‘Putting the pieces together’, the pack is written by Louise Morse, a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and expert in dementia. It contains leaflets exploring a whole range of issues relating to dementia including the initial diagnosis, support for the caregiver and understanding challenging behaviour and communication changes.

Crucially from a Christian perspective, the pack is threaded through with scripture and the biblical principle that the person always remains – regardless of their cognition or capacity.

Louise says, “When dementia comes into your life you need all the information you can get – but you don’t have time to read a book about it. Secular advice springs from the understanding that we are simply the sum of our parts, but within a Christian context we see that we are eternal spirit beings in human bodies.”

Back for a moment to Robert and the conversation I had with him all those years ago. Eventually, he did get help through a charity dedicated to carers. His mother started attending the charity’s day centre several afternoons a week, giving him much-needed breathing space to manage the affairs of both his household and his mother’s as well as time for hobbies. Through the organisation he also connected with a counsellor and joined a carers’ support group. On a couple of occasions, he arranged for his mother to go on a residential break, giving him respite.

But here’s the thing. In researching this blog, I Googled the charity and discovered it closed its doors in 2014, citing financial difficulties. Years of austerity measures have taken their toll on the social care sector. If Robert needed to access such services today, would he struggle even more?

In this climate of cuts, and now with the impact of a pandemic to cope with, the role of churches in supporting those in their congregations who are facing dementia is perhaps more crucial than ever. Our pack is designed to be used not just by those in a person’s immediate family, but shared with and browsed by the wider church family. It’s all of our responsibility to be informed and equipped, and prepared to face dementia together.

One last thought about Robert. At the time, I was struck by how a man who was caring for his mother for 60 hours a week would willingly give up a precious evening to talk to a student in a pub. Obviously it was an issue he felt passionate about and wanted to raise awareness of. There was that. At the same time, he agreed to do the interview knowing full well that while the article I wrote would be submitted for an assignment, it wouldn’t necessarily get published.

I came away with the sense that life as a carer can be very lonely. As much as anything, he wanted someone to talk to.

For those in our church families, will we be that listening ear?

The pack is £12 and can be purchased at www.pilgrimsfriend.org.uk/resources/dementia-information-pack, or call 0300 303 1403 to order a copy.

(‘Time to Talk Befriending’ scheme member aged 91)

We hear a lot about the issue of loneliness in our society. Experiencing chronic loneliness can occur at any age. The risk of loneliness is not driven by age but by people’s circumstances which can differ depending on their age. The death of a loved one, and the onset of illness and disability are more often times of vulnerability for older people.

So, what is loneliness, why do we need to do something about it and what can we do?

What is loneliness?

There is no agreed definition of ‘loneliness’ but one explanation is that it is a painful feeling that occurs when there is a gap, or a mismatch, between the number and quality of social relationships and connections that we have, and those we would like. Others suggest that there are two dimensions to loneliness: social and emotional. Social loneliness occurs when someone is missing a wider social network and emotional loneliness is caused when you miss an “intimate relationship”. On the whole, loneliness is described as an unwelcome, painful and unpleasant feeling.

Impact of Loneliness

• Loneliness is one of the greatest public health challenges of our time. Three quarters of GPs surveyed say they see 1 to 5 people a day who are suffering from loneliness.
• Loneliness has been linked to conditions such as heart disease, strokes and Alzheimer’s.
• Loneliness and social isolation are harmful to our health: research shows that lacking social connections is as damaging to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day (Holt-Lunstad, 2015).
• Loneliness and low social interaction are predictive of suicide in older age (O’Connell et al, 2004)
• 200,000 older people haven’t had a conversation with a friend or relative in the past month.
• The number of over 50s suffering from loneliness is set to reach 2 million by 2025/6. This amounts to a 49% increase in 10 years.

What is being done to combat loneliness?

Loneliness has such a detrimental impact on so many people’s lives that it has become a topic of national importance. In 2018 the Government launched its strategy to tackle the issue and national campaigns (Age UK ‘No-one should have no-one’ and The Campaign to End Loneliness) has helped to raise awareness.

Traditionally, initiatives to tackle loneliness have been focused on practical ways to bring people together such as clubs, group activities, and outings. These have made a difference to numerous lives and a more recent innovation of linking people of different generations together has become very popular.

Many lonely older people also have mobility issues so they are unable to get out to clubs or activities or meet other people; the danger is that they become hidden and forgotten members of our communities. To prevent this from happening a growing number of local befriending charities have sprung up in the UK. They match volunteers with lonely, vulnerable older people for regular visits or phone calls and, where possible, outings. A range of other services are also offered: group peer befriending, signposting, special events at Christmas and prayer and pastoral support from a chaplaincy team.

What can I do?

• Some older people view loneliness as a normal part of ageing that needs to be accepted. Others wouldn’t ask for help and would try to support themselves. These attitudes and the stigma that often surrounds loneliness can be a barrier to older people receiving support that could improve the quality of their lives. Everyone who comes into contact with an older person either in a professional capacity or as a member of their Church or community can play a part in preventing loneliness by getting to know them, listening, and being aware.
• Keep an eye out for those in your church and local community who you know are living alone, who may have experienced a life-changing event such as a bereavement, or who are on their own at Church and might be lonely. Get to know them, listen to them, introduce them to people you know, invite them along to Church groups and events and go with them.
• Consider befriending an older person by volunteering with a local befriending charity. A phone call or a visit once a week can make a world of difference to an older person and to you! For example, Time to Talk Befriending is an award-winning charity operating in Brighton & Hove, Worthing and Adur, receives positive feedback from volunteers and scheme members alike:

Volunteer Jo: “I’ve had such a positive experience – I can honestly say it’s been so impactful and enriching to my life! Simply taking the time to have a cuppa and chat about everything from house plants to politics to travel has been wonderful – sharing life lessons from someone in an older generation is so valuable. And I feel like I’ve been on hand to help when she’s needed it too.”

Scheme member aged 90: “All my family have gone and my friends have passed away. I have felt like an orphan for so long… I can’t tell you the difference it’s made.”

To find a befriending charity in your area check out the Befriending Networks website: www.befriending.co.uk

What does God say?

We are never alone; God is with us ‘I look behind me and you’re there, then up ahead and you’re there too – your reassuring presence, coming and going.’ (Psalm 139 v 5 & 6 The Message). We are also a family of believers where no-one should feel lonely ‘God sets the lonely in families.’ (Psalm 68 verse 6 The NIV). As God has sought each one of us out (Luke Ch. 19 v 10) let us then lookout for those who are lonely and welcome them in.

For further information and resources on loneliness, visit our resource hub.

Claire Godley is a trustee for befriending charity Time to Talk Befriending (www.tttb.org.uk) and works for Age UK West Sussex, Brighton & Hove.

Older people are spending more time alone than ever before and this can detrimentally impact health, wellbeing and emotional resilience.

For many older people, regular routines have been put into disarray as social activities and meetings with friends have been unable to proceed, exacerbating the adverse effects of loneliness.

We all know how important community is. If the coronavirus pandemic has highlighted anything, it’s how much we need each other. People need to know they are cared for, remembered, and loved.

“So, we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” – 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

At Faith in Later Life, we are doing everything we can (with the help of people just like you!) to reach the lonely and isolated. We are committed to seeing older people flourish in their faith, friendships, and communities. We think that as a people, we have a responsibility to reach out, to love, and to empower older people in their day-to-day lives.

There has never been a more important time to rally around those who need it most, offering help and support where we can to those who are struggling with loneliness and isolation during this time.

Communication is key, as many older people have been unable to attend their social groups or have visitors to their homes. Often, something as simple as a phone call or a handwritten note can make all the difference to those in social isolation.

How can you reach out? Who could you contact to encourage today?

We are excited to announce that we are selling Easter postcards! And if you are a Church Champion, you can receive a number for free! 

Why not write Easter postcards to those on your street, in your church, at your local care home, or from your social club and let them know they are not forgotten? For information on how to order please click here.

We were delighted that over 2,000 Christmas postcards were sent to older people in December, and we had some excellent responses from many who were involved:

“The postcard initiative is excellent to send Christmas cards to all of our elderly.”

“I received two cards myself from Faith in Later Life: I appreciated not being forgotten at Christmas.”

“Thanks to faith in later life for supporting elderly people both physically and spiritually especially during this period of shielding and lockdown which has been so hard for so many of our elderly family, friends and neighbours.”

“I loved the Christmas postcards and they encouraged me to send round more to my older contacts this Christmas and try to do that on a more regular basis.”

“The Christmas postcards were an excellent idea and were well received by those to whom I sent them. I am pleased you have plans to produce others throughout the year. You are excellent at engendering enthusiasm for which I am grateful.”

This Easter, we are hoping to write postcards to as many individuals as we can. And we hope you will join us! Click here for more info.

Whether people in the fourth age have strong, little or no faith – they matter to God and they should matter to the church. There is no room for ageism, discrimination or exclusion of people on the basis of their age, disability or frailty. It is not acceptable for people to be overlooked, ignored or forgotten because they are unable to attend church, don’t like modern music, or do not feel able to take a physically active role in the life of the church. Churches need to acknowledge the ‘Gift of years’ – and recognise the experience, skill, and wisdom of those in the fourth age. They need to not only engage with older people in their membership and communities but embrace and celebrate their involvement.

Historically, churches would often provide care, support, and sanctuary for older and frail people in their communities. Organisations such as Pilgrims’ Friends Society, Methodist Homes for the Aged, Alms houses, etc. had church roots and served older people in society with housing, care, and support. With a rise in cases of social isolation and loneliness, pressures on public funding have lead to reduced social services and increasing numbers of older people being at risk of abuse, neglect, or exploitation. Churches and other Christian faith organisations have both an opportunity and a moral duty to focus on supporting people living in the fourth age.

The Covid pandemic has taught us a great deal about some of the needs of older people: 

• The impact of lock-down has opened the eyes of many to the plight of thousands of older people who normally live alone and struggle with social isolation.

• The crisis in many care homes has highlighted the lack of funding, resources, training, and value for the provision of care in these settings.

• The disastrous and illegal decision-making of some medical practitioners and agencies, regarding resuscitation and hospital admission decisions, have been exposed and addressed, with an improved understanding of the need for Advance Care Planning.

• The difficulties and dilemmas facing the families of those living with Dementia have finally been recognised and the challenge of caring for someone who lacks the cognitive function to understand what is going is better understood.

• The risks to people living in the fourth age of abuse, neglect, and exploitation have been realised, with some older people being left with no care and support, others experiencing financial fraud or psychological abuse fuelled by a fear of the virus.

In many communities, Christian faith organisations became the mainstay of help and support to older people, providing shopping, meals, shelter, advice, befriending, and regular contact; at a time when the country was immobilised, not only by the lock-down measures but the threat and fear of the impact of the Covid-19 virus.

Whether older people are living alone, with family members, or in a care home – churches are ideally placed to offer spiritual and pastoral care. Many churches and Christian faith organisations work with other agencies to offer practical support, mealtime services, and social activities. It is important that such Christian services don’t overlook the spiritual and pastoral needs of older people – that coffee and cake is accompanied by a listening ear, open mind, and a heart for sharing the love of Jesus. There are many opportunities to help the spiritual growth of an older person – whatever their faith – and we should not be shy in sharing the good news of the Gospel, introducing an older person to Jesus, or helping their faith to develop and grow.

Ministry and mission to older people are not achieved without clear commitment, strong leadership, and careful consideration. Churches should work with others in their area and with other agencies, to understand what is needed in their community in terms of ministries among older people. People living in the fourth age usually know how they could be supported with spiritual and pastoral needs – but sometimes they feel overlooked or forgotten by a busy church focused on children’s work and other worthwhile ministries and outreach. Some older people feel frustrated that they are not included in the active ministry of the church – with assumptions made that they would be too tired or too frail – when they could play a less physical role, or provide the important prayer support for the work of the church.

There are many opportunities for intergenerational learning and serving in churches, involving those in the fourth age working with younger generations. The older person has so much to offer younger adults – in terms of experience, knowledge, skills, and wisdom. The younger person has a great deal to offer the older person – with their energy, new ideas, technological skills and modern forms of communication. Working together, the generations can learn from each other, develop more understanding and respect for each other and be stronger with the things they have in common. Younger people can help those living in the fourth age to feel positive, respected, and valued – help them have the confidence to contribute to church life and kingdom service.

Now is the time for all churches to review how they currently value and involve those in the fourth age; how they currently support the needs of older people – those in their membership, those in local care homes, and those living in their communities. Many churches will already be providing outreach activities such as coffee mornings, luncheon clubs, quiz nights, film clubs, etc. without a mention of the gospel, an offer of prayer, or an opportunity for pastoral support. There is a sense of urgency in mission work to older people, in order to ensure that everyone has the chance to hear the gospel and respond to the message of the cross and resurrection of Jesus. Churches need to realise this and focus on how they can best outreach and support the spiritual and pastoral needs of those people living in the fourth age in their community.

There are many national organisations that work and provide services for older people. Churches can partner with other agencies who may have the knowledge and expertise in supporting older people. There are also many Christian organisations that offer guidance, training, and resources to churches in establishing services and support for older people. What is needed, is a commitment to change – to focus on what is needed for local older people, within the church family and community; to take every opportunity to share the gospel message to those who do not yet know Jesus and to grow the faith of older Christians; to be prepared to work with other churches and agencies, to reach out to offer spiritual and pastoral support to those living in the fourth age.

What churches CAN do towards establishing ministries among older people 

• Identify someone within the leadership/membership to lead for ministries among older
• Include specific ministries for older people within the church strategic plan.
• Involve people living in the fourth age in planning for outreach activities and church services.
• Include and involve older people in leading aspects of worship, teaching, and discipleship.
• Ensure all housebound older members or those in care homes have regular pastoral visits.
• Encourage people in the fourth age to remain active and involved in all aspects of church life.
• Make contact/links with local care homes.
• Commit to becoming a Dementia-friendly church and part of a local Dementia-friendly community.
• Update safeguarding policies and training to include safeguarding adults at risk.
• Provide opportunities for intergenerational learning and serving – within the church and outreach. Create opportunities for older people to be supported in discussions about their own future, their care needs, and support for future treatments/care.
• Make contact and engage with local and national Christian ministries among older people – for guidance, resources, and training.

Copyright Professor Keith Brown excerpt from ‘Guidance for Christian Faith Organisations in the Support and Value of Older People’ – become a Church Champion to receive a free copy of the full guidance booklet.

Debbie attends St Christopher’s Church in Springfield, Birmingham. Of course, currently, the church is closed due to COVID and the area is currently struggling with some of the highest infection rates in Birmingham. So, these have been challenging times for Debbie. 

Debbie is part of the Anna Chaplaincy. As a chaplain, it is her job to serve the spiritual needs of the older people in her church congregation, as well as the spiritual needs of those in four other parishes. So, she has her hands full. 

If you don’t know what the Anna Chaplaincy is, it is a wonderful organisation that was started as a way to support older people’s spiritual needs whether they have a faith or not. The name comes from Anna in the Bible. Anna met Jesus as a baby and because of that first meeting, she was one of the first evangelists who went and hope with other people. In Debbie’s words, “the Anna Chaplaincy tries to join the dots between people and God, between people and the church, between people and the community, and between people and their families/carers. As chaplains, we try to provide that connection.” 

During this time, it goes without saying that people are lonelier than ever before. Nobody has access to church in the same way they used to, and access to community is also sadly restricted. For some, this means they can go weeks without seeing or speaking to another person. Part of Debbie’s role involves helping older people regain that connection with the church and its community. As Debbie told us, “I used to focus on lonely people and those who were isolated before COVID but now that feels like it is everybody. Our harvest field is quite big right now.” 

Debbie shared with us how she sends out personalised prayer cards to people with bits of scripture. She told us how, “it is a personalised thing I send to everybody. I also pressed some forget me nots from my garden because I wanted people to know ‘I won’t forget you because God hasn’t forgotten you either’. It was important for me to do these personalised things. I won’t have anybody on my watch who is desperate for company or communication. I do my best to phone people up regularly and have tried every which way to create connection where I can.” 

Over the years, Debbie has gained significant experience in the field of caring for older people. As a child, she was born to older parents and so she grew up around many older people. This upbringing naturally wove itself into her life as she began serving older people. We were astonished to hear just how much experience Debbie has had over the years caring for and helping older people. She listed her extensive experience to us: 

“I was a social worker. I then managed a day centre for older adults. I also worked with a Dementia charity. I worked with carers looking after older people and the older people they cared for. I have been a home carer, assisting with personal care. I have managed sheltered accommodation. More recently, I have worked for a voluntary service to help people do chair-based exercises.” 

After her time managing a day centre, Debbie became seriously ill to the point she nearly died. She had a stoma and after coming through and eight-hour surgery, she felt grateful to be alive. While she was recovering in the hospital, a chaplain visited her and Debbie asked her, “why would God put me through all that?” The woman looked her in the eyes and replied with a smile, “I look forward to seeing what God does with you next.”

A couple of years later, Debbie came to a crossroads in her life. Her contract at work was coming to an end due to funding and she didn’t know what to do or where to go next. So, she prayed to the Lord. Seemingly by chance, she came across an advertisement for the Anna Chaplaincy. She remembered the kindness of the chaplain who had visited her in the hospital and considered how her experience could help older people struggling through similar situations. However, she couldn’t do the job because she needed to be paid. 

In June last year when Debbie was commissioned by her church to start working as a chaplain, she gave as much time as she could to volunteering in the position alongside her job. A member of the church saw her hard work and efforts and paid a generous sum to the church so that she could quit her job and continue her chaplaincy work. Debbie’s minister also applied for funders and just four months after her commission, the church received two to three years of funding for Debbie to do her work. When God calls you to do something and you are obedient to that call, He always makes a way.

“God is just so amazing!” she told us, “that funding gave me permission to do what I’ve always wanted; to serve the Lord using my faith to bless and encourage older people.” 

God gives each of us a burden for something and as we spoke with Debbie, it was clear the Lord had broken her heart for the older people in her community. He had given her a deep passion and love to serve others. Her passion and heart for this ministry, through the strengthening and equipping of the Holy Spirit, has helped her reflect the love of God to other people. 

Debbie shared with us how, “for me, chaplaincy has got to be a heart thing. Because I knew God had bought me through so much, I can relate to older people because I know what it’s like to be laying in hospital feeling powerless and having lots of things taken away from you.” 

‘For such a time as this’ has always been the phrase that has followed Debbie throughout her life, and she is reminded of it often. She shared with us how she hopes that communities and churches will catch onto the vision of helping and serve older people for such a time as this. Because there is no better time. Our nation is struggling under the pressure of loneliness and declining mental health in older people. It is a huge problem and one that the church need to address. 

To encourage us all, Debbie shared with us some stories of God working in the lives of the older people she is connected with. Before lockdown had commenced, Debbie was keeping up her monthly visits to a local care home for those with Dementia. She went with a few other people every month and shared with us how, “it was hard work because we didn’t get much feedback. But we did it anyway. I went by faith. It’s about what God is doing through us. We can’t always see what the Holy Spirit is doing in terms of connecting with people.” 

During one visit, Debbie and her team held a service and at the end they handed out paper crosses to the residents. On one side of the cross was written the individual’s name and on the other side was the Lord’s prayer. One man took hold of the cross, stared at it intensely, and held it for a very long time. Debbie said how, “it was as if he knew that he could hold onto the cross. The cross was for him. It blessed me. His speech had been taken away, but he knew the truth of God. The spirit remains the same. It’s almost like he knew that. The way he was holding onto it and looking at it, I can’t express the joy I felt in seeing that.” 

Another lady Debbie paid visits to before COVID lives on her own and has carers come in four times a day to help her with daily life. Whenever Debbie saw her, she would talk and talk, often repeating the same stories over and over again. When she could, Debbie would interrupt and start to sing ‘What a Friend We Have in Jesus’. Despite her Dementia, this lady will know the song word for word and sing along. Debbie will then start to recite the Lord’s prayer and the lady would say it along with her, word for word, as well as the psalms. And whenever Debbie asks if she can pray, the lady immediately responds by putting her head down, sitting in silence, and listening. 

“You know that God is there and that He is working,” Debbie shared. “We are probably in one of the darkest times of our history, but that hymn, that line is a testimony to every older person I speak to. They all testify to the assurance of Jesus in their life during this time.” 

Debbie also shared a story with us about a friend she has known for ten years who has COVID. They spoke on the phone just the other day and she was telling Debbie just how poorly she is. And yet, despite her suffering, she told Debbie “I know that this too shall pass.” Even during a time of great sickness and suffering, she knows her God is with her. She knows this too shall pass. 

“That’s why I do what I do,” Debbie told us, “because older people show me Jesus. Just by being them. It doesn’t matter whether they have Dementia or not. They show me Jesus.” 

What a wonderful encouragement! So often, we consider how our service helps others and we don’t take a moment to consider how God might use other people to help and bless us. God works through all people – even older people with Dementia or Alzheimer’s – nothing is impossible for Him. Whether a person can speak, hear, stand up straight or not, is no obstacle to the Lord. 

As it says in Philippians, ‘For it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.’ – Philippians 2.13 

How is God working in you today? Perhaps take a moment to ask Him what He wants to speak to you about. Just like the lady in the story with Dementia, bow your head in prayer and just listen – you never know what God might say! 

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